At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
