i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
