how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
as a side note pls kill me
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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