D3 body, D1 cock
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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