if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
