Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Randomize
