I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
plz talk dirty to me
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
