David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Church boner. Awkwardddd
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
