i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
