we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
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