I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
