PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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