ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize