Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
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