addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
