YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
