like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Randomize
