As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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