We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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