So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Randomize
