walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
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