How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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