Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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