i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
So squirting runs in the family.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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