OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
