We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I think I am morally bankrupt
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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