Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize