On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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