paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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