Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
