Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
