Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
