he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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