How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize