I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
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