its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
