forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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