This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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