I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
