I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
