Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Sorry about my life...
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