He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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