That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
My vagina just recognized that song.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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