Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
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