Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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