also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
