So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
