I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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