No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
