Sry I called you an 8
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
