is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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