I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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